Eating for the sake of food availabilty - Phat File vol.1
Tonight I got together with a colleague at the VPL to work on an assignment that is due next week. Frustrations from that assignment aside, I realized something tonight.
I was meandering through downtown, contemplating taking a bus, when it occurred to me that I could grab a bite to eat. I cannot adequately relay to you, dear reader, the internal process that ensued.
Lots of chit chat between my "good guy inner self" and some "internal bad guy"... that little devil voice that told me how good Wendy's would be. Or a shwarma. or.. or ... or...
Lots of options along Robson Street, as I tried to stay focused on the task at hand - getting home.
As I tried to ignore my internal bad guy, I peered impatiently down Robson, willing the bus to come. Now here, dear reader, is where you realize I could walk home if I wanted to. It really isn't that far at all. A nice hike, even though I have about 50 pounds of books on my back, including exciting titles such as the Sears List of Subject Headings (and the Canadian Companion).
The debate between my good guy inner self and my internal bad guy went on for about 5 or 10 minutes, when I finally, and proudly, went with the good guy, and not only did I not grab a bite to eat, but I decided to walk home.
The biggest realization- the a-ha moment- I wasn't even hungry.
Nope.
Still actually quite satisfied from the sushi I had for dinner.
So why all the thoughts of grabbing a bite to eat?
Because I could.
Because it was there.
Because I knew it was yummy, and could ignore that it wasn't the healthiest choice.
Eating because the food is available.
Makes no sense. none. zero. zip. zilch.
It's like putting gas in your car because you are passing a gas station, except you don't need gas, so the gas overflows, catches fire, car explodes, tragically taking you with it. The End.
Tonight was a victory for me. A very small one, considering a bigger victory would be to get up early and go to the gym. But atleast I have recognized that, although I am sort of on this round-about quest to lose weight and get in shape, I continually sabotage myself and my efforts.
Well, this has been a most honest blogging session.
Probably enough for now.
I was meandering through downtown, contemplating taking a bus, when it occurred to me that I could grab a bite to eat. I cannot adequately relay to you, dear reader, the internal process that ensued.
Lots of chit chat between my "good guy inner self" and some "internal bad guy"... that little devil voice that told me how good Wendy's would be. Or a shwarma. or.. or ... or...
Lots of options along Robson Street, as I tried to stay focused on the task at hand - getting home.
As I tried to ignore my internal bad guy, I peered impatiently down Robson, willing the bus to come. Now here, dear reader, is where you realize I could walk home if I wanted to. It really isn't that far at all. A nice hike, even though I have about 50 pounds of books on my back, including exciting titles such as the Sears List of Subject Headings (and the Canadian Companion).
The debate between my good guy inner self and my internal bad guy went on for about 5 or 10 minutes, when I finally, and proudly, went with the good guy, and not only did I not grab a bite to eat, but I decided to walk home.
The biggest realization- the a-ha moment- I wasn't even hungry.
Nope.
Still actually quite satisfied from the sushi I had for dinner.
So why all the thoughts of grabbing a bite to eat?
Because I could.
Because it was there.
Because I knew it was yummy, and could ignore that it wasn't the healthiest choice.
Eating because the food is available.
Makes no sense. none. zero. zip. zilch.
It's like putting gas in your car because you are passing a gas station, except you don't need gas, so the gas overflows, catches fire, car explodes, tragically taking you with it. The End.
Tonight was a victory for me. A very small one, considering a bigger victory would be to get up early and go to the gym. But atleast I have recognized that, although I am sort of on this round-about quest to lose weight and get in shape, I continually sabotage myself and my efforts.
Well, this has been a most honest blogging session.
Probably enough for now.
posted by asthmatic at 9:52 PM
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